As we approach the holidays, tensions can run high amongst family members; that may be especially true for divorced or separated parents. As parents we want the holiday season to be filled with joy for our children as well as for ourselves. We reflect back on our holidays during our own childhood and strive to replicate the joy or replace what may be our own difficult memories with beautiful memories for our own children. For parents that are newly divorced or separated this time of year may be even more stressful as the pain of loss of the once intact family feels ever present. One of the best gifts that divorced parents can give their children is a peaceful holiday season. As difficult as it may be for you, the parent, it is more difficult for your children. They feel the painful loss as well, and want nothing more than to be able to spend time with both parents as well as extended family and friends. Those events and activities that make up our holiday traditions are important to them as well. So, while it may be difficult it is likely best if you are able to negotiate the holiday schedule well in advance of the holiday itself. Respect both families and extended families and their traditions, and above all, remember that your children are a piece of both parents and an appreciation and respect for all family members will show your children how to negotiate and resolve conflict in the most positive way.